Tag: Abuse

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The Woman at the Well

The struggle is real, weekly I meet women who are living in addiction, sexual abuse, mental abuse, self-destructive behavior based in their childhood experiences and more.  From my childhood until I was 47 years of age, I was held captive by my past and struggled under many of the before mentioned circumstances.  I had accepted Jesus as my Savior however nothing in my life changed, I knew God was real however I lacked the understanding that He wanted to be part of my life daily and that through Him I would become free.  I am sharing this with you because Jesus had an encounter with a woman much like me and He not only brought salvation to her, but He changed her life forever. This is my story, it became God’s story, I am forgiven and not forgotten, loved, and valued by my Forever Father God.  I wanted to share with you today through scripture how God wants to encounter each and every one of us in this very way…bringing us into His Kingdom giving us the authority to speak life in what seem like desperate circumstances and walk in the grace and mercy only Jesus can bring.

Walk with me and open your Bible to John 4, identify with this amazing woman and how God changed her life. (Please note that these are my teaching notes, be kind to the grammar.) Pray before you begin and ask God to reveal to you something new about Him and something new about yourself.

The Woman at the Well

Verse 4 we see that Jesus “had to pass” through Samaria. Everywhere and everyone that Jesus visited, spoke to, and healed was a divine appointment not only for that time, but for today and for tomorrow. You even read this is a divine appointment…What is God saying to you?

Verse 6 It was the 6th hour or noon in Jewish time – hot, dusty, a time when everyone was inside resting, seeking shade.  The only time she would go, so that no one would see her…full of shame, guilt, based on her life and her reputation.

Verse 7 Jesus asked her to “Give Me a drink” an invitation to truth, God’s way of putting you to work…Jesus is asking us to give Him something daily, our faith, praise, worship.

Verse 8 no one else was there.  The is a private, personal between meeting between Jesus and the woman…like He desires to have with each of us…one on one…intimate and personal.  His calling to her was not for anyone else but her.

Verse 9 The woman is unsure,  unworthy, she knows who she is and how she lives, the label the world has put on her, the lie that she has no choice. God sees beyond our circumstances, our physical form to our spirit…remember we are all His creation and we all belong to Him.

Verse 10 If YOU Knew…open the flood gates here it comes “truth” gift from God, Jesus is inviting her to ask, an invitation from God the Father. “Living Water” in the Greek means Life Rain…continually feeding us truth, nourishing, growing, steady…provided from heaven for you intimately and personally.  Think about rain and the different ways we experience it…

Verse 11 She is not getting it…”Sir you have nothing to draw with” she is only seeing the physical, worldly way not the supernatural truth of this “Life Rain” how long did it take you? Have you really gotten it, are you experiencing a constant rain?  Are there times of desert, dry, scorching dryness in your life? Are you held captive by the devils lies that you are not worthy of God’s love?  Do you live on the outskirts of Christian Life?

Verse 12 She is asking Jesus. Who are you? This man is speaking to her, there is something different about Him. She is moving from the world truth into the spiritual truth.

Verse 13 Jesus shows her and us that we are all the same, loved and cherish by God who created us. The “Life Rain” he is offering is for everyone.

Verse 14 Now here is the invitation to drink…Whoever drinks…never thirst again…forever changed, transformed…ask Jesus, ask God, forgiven, washed clean by this life rain… it brings, forgiveness, hope, mercy, grace.

Verse 15 The woman is still thinking only in the physical instead of thinking “Yes God”…we must hunger for it, yes taste and drink…this water this rain will fill you up and continue filling you until it spills out on to all of those around you…shared truth…your story is now and forever His story living in you.

Verses 16-18 Jesus now brings the hammer…I know you! Truth of his power and knowledge. This truth is revealed to her by Jesus recounting her life…She thinks how? He doesn’t know me?  You see God know every word that you have ever said, every thought, action, yes mistake, situation, sin…nothing is hidden from God.

Verses 19-20 The woman still cannot perceive who Jesus is and what He is truly offering, she thinks He is a prophet or religious man. She starts in speaking of religious ritual “worshipped in this mountain” conditions for worship…excuses, rules, ritual, specific place.  She knows if she even dared to show herself in the temple she would be rejected even stoned because she is a Samaritan and a prostitute. Are you suffering under a religious spirit? You have told yourself I will never be accepted in church, never belong? Sadly, today there are churches still making religious law their guide and not God’s truth that He loves ALL people. Jesus gave is life for ALL.  I want to say right here that the devil knows scripture as well or better than we do and he uses it to corrupt and distract, man uses rules and ritual, outward appearance and lifestyle to judge when scripture clearly tells us that only God knows the motives of the heart and only God can be the judge. Only God has the power to bring someone to Him, our responsibility is to share His truth, by Loving God and Loving People. Remember, a truth believer and follower of Jesus Christ seeks to have a personal relationship with Him…

Verses 21-22 Jesus rebukes this thought, your thinking is wrong, the truth of God has been corrupted by man’s limited knowledge, God is not a place, He is not found in a pastor, denomination or ritual ”neither in this mountain or in Jerusalem” …He is in His Word, He is Creator, Father, All Knowing and Seeing, Forever…Never Changing, Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow…SUPERNATURAL Hebrew 4:12 says that truth is reveal through God’s Word living and active able to separate your flesh (sin, worldly thinking) from your spirit. Our worship for the One True God dwells within us coming through us in our attitude and actions.

Verse 23-24 Now is the time, praise and worship Him who lives in you and brings nourishment to your spirit daily.  This truth is for everyone God calls to worship Him in Spirit and Truth

Verse 25-26 Truth revealed to all…”The woman said to Him, “I know that Messiah is coming (He who is called Christ); when that One comes, He will declare all things to us.” Jesus said to her, “I who speak to you am He.”

Verse 27 The disciples recognized the importance of this teaching and so they did not question her or disrupt what Jesus was sharing with her…if you are familiar with the disciples they often would attempt to protect or distance Jesus from people.  I believe it is very significant that they said nothing as if they recognized the importance of “this encounter”.

Verses 28-29 At this moment God’s truth became hers and she could not hold back from sharing with anyone who would listen…determined. Her life was forever changed.  Freedom from the shame and guilt, sin forgiven, a new life reborn in Jesus.  Just for a moment close your eyes she her running back to the town and encountering people in the street, no longer afraid of what they would say or do.  The freedom she received from Jesus gave her the authority to walk in God’s righteousness and truth. Verse 29 says “Come and see this man who knew everything about me and has given me a new life, declaring I am forgiven, come and experience this truth for yourself HE IS THE CHRIST! Our Savior! God in the flesh!” paraphrased

Verse 30 The people responded…God used her to share the truth, to bring people to Him so that they might receive the “Life Rain” He was offering.  Later on, in verses 39-42 We see that many came to Him and they asked Him to stay with them. Because of the women bringing them to hear for themselves many were saved.  Not on her word alone, we must believe from our own hearing and come to Jesus as He calls us. Through this broken woman, Jesus brought truth to an entire region and the people of that area declared that “Jesus is the Savior of the world”.

I have saved these verses for now because this truth is for many. In verses 31-38 Jesus disciples still had not grasped who Jesus was and their responsibility as believers and disciples. The woman heard and responded, shared truth, allowed the life rain to change her, she took that truth and sow for the harvest.  Many hear the truth of Christ and even follow that message to church; however it gets hung up right there. The disciples witnessed Jesus in action and yet walked in ignorance of what He was calling them to do…it took the cross and resurrection for them to truly grasp all Jesus had been teaching them as they walked with Him side by side daily.

What can we learn from God’s writing here? This woman responded to God’s call in her life, first she had to allow the “life rain” Jesus was offering to wash away her past and see herself through God’s eyes.  To claim her identity in God not the world.  This claiming is where her strength came from, right now you must let Jesus direct your every thought and action.  Feelings and attitudes often are attached to the past.  The devil will use this to set you off course, distract and teardown the grace God has given you.  Use God’s Holy Word as a guide in every thought and action, let Him show you areas in your life that the devil is using to keep you for your true freedom and purpose.  If God has forgiven you and forgotten you MUST also…there is a tendency to continually analyze yourself, comparing yourself to others around you. To listen to the “well meaning” you must remember that the devil works through Christians as well as the world.  Do not let this endless cycle of self-evaluation kill your confidence and distract you from your unique personality and the special purpose God has given you alone. Jesus is calling you to be His church, to represent and present His truth and love to a fallen world.

I speak these words over myself as well.  Jesus let these Words of Truth sink in deeply and fill my spirit. I claim who God created me to be and I daily speak life into myself and those around me.  Daily we must make sure God is going before us in every decision and that we are walking in His will.

Isaiah 54:17 says ““No weapon that is formed against you will prosper; And every tongue that accuses you in judgment you will condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, And their vindication is from Me,” declares the Lord.” NASB

2 Corinthians 10:5 says “for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses. We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.” NASB

“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.” Ephesians 6:12 NASB

Blessings, Laurie

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The Road We Travel – Part II “In the Eye of the Beholder”

in the eye of the beholderFor ladies young and old our appearance plays a huge part of who we are.  In a world so caught up in how the physical body looks the road to feeling comfortable in your skin is difficult.  Every form of media tells us we have to look like a A&F models.  In fact some of you may not know but when A&F launched one of their first catalogs the young men were shirtless.  Their catalog looked more like a glamour magazine than advertising clothing.  In their stores they put large screen TVs with videos running of young people scantily clad with clothing that looked two sizes to small.  This has been going on for decades.  During my time braless halter tops and mid-drift blouses with one inch zippers on jeans were the rage.  Bathing suits had less fabric than underwear.  Today, plastic surgery to increase or decease your body is common.  Products that will help you lose weight, grow your eye lashes, hide wrinkles are billon dollar industries.  Satan wins this battle everyday.  All of this creates insecurity, low self-image and unworthiness.  To further complicate things the devil has us believing we need to look like a princess to catch and keep the prince.  Unfortunately, how we look often determines whether doors will open or close in life as well.  So in all of this how do we as Christian Women find our truth, our identity and value.  How do we balance obsession with a healthy view of self?  

“Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.”  1 Corinthians 6:19-20 NASB

First, I want to address your appearance.  I believe it is important to take care of yourself.  Eat healthy, moderate exercise and take care of your physical body.  I truly believe everyone has an optimum weight that is not so much a number or size but how we feel and how our body functions.  We need to find a balance, a comfortable place one that can be maintained without obsessing.  I guarantee this will be a life long challenge, maybe as a woman your greatest…to keep how you see yourself from becoming an obsession.  I can prove this with one example.  Have you ever been shopping for clothing and nothing you try on looks good or fits? Be honest for me that’s most of the time! If you are young finding your unique comfort zone now will help you as your life unfolds.  Learning how to love and feel good about yourself is not the true solution to overcoming how you see yourself. Your identity MUST be found in Jesus Christ, only when you find it in Him will you be able to discern and fight the devils traps.  It is vital for you to understand how precious you are in God’s sight…so valuable. Loved and valued so much that Jesus went to the cross for you.  You also should value your life because you were made in His image; you are His most precious creation. His love for us is truly unmeasurable. And as a Christian woman, you are the daughter of the King; redeemed and made into royalty through the work of the Cross. But when you make “feeling good about yourself” a focal point, you quickly take your eyes off Christ and become wrapped up in self. Unhealthy behavior will feed a continuing cycle of obsession and balance.  Sometimes in an effort to find yourself the devil will speak lies to you causing destructive behavior.  Getting help is essential, please don’t let Satan use self-inflicted physical abuse to destroy you. 

Scripture tells us that you are not to have confidence in yourself but in Christ only.  It’s important for you to focus on how our Lord sees you, how what’s in your heart is the measure of who you are in Jesus. Your confidence and strength must come from the heavenly Father.  Any other source is fueled in pride.  You will walk a fine line in this as well.  You need to continually be asking Jesus to refine away your prideful thoughts and realize that you are who you are inside and out because of who created you.  You must believe that God created you in love and that He loved you first. 

 “For we [who are born-again have been reborn from above—spiritually transformed, renewed, set apart for His purpose and] are the true circumcision, who worship in the Spirit of God and glory and take pride and exult in Christ Jesus and place no confidence [in what we have or who we are] in the flesh.”  Philippians 3:3 AMP

Paul tells us that he counts all his personal accomplishments “as rubbish” compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ.  This must be your priority as well. When you understand that it’s not about you but about how you can serve a God who loves you.  When you make your life pursuit in knowing God and loving Him as He loves you freedom is found. 

“But more than that, I count everything as loss compared to the priceless privilege and supreme advantage of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord [and of growing more deeply and thoroughly acquainted with Him—a joy unequaled]. For His sake I have lost everything, and I consider it all garbage, so that I may gain Christ.”  Philippians 3:8 AMP

Jesus could not be more clear when He says, “If anyone desires to come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me” 

 And Jesus was saying to them all, “If anyone wishes to follow Me [as My disciple], he must deny himself [set aside selfish interests], and take up his cross daily [expressing a willingness to endure whatever may come] and follow Me [believing in Me, conforming to My example in living and, if need be, suffering or perhaps dying because of faith in Me].”  Luke 9:23 AMP

It may seem hard to believe that self-denial, rather than self-esteem, could actually be the solution to female insecurity. But when you let self fade into the background and become consumed with Jesus Christ, your personal insecurities will melt away. You no longer look to yourself…your talent, beauty, or uniqueness to find confidence. You must not depend on others for accolades because gratification through objects and people don’t last but are just a momentarily.  Instead, you learn to find your confidence in who He is, rather than in who the world says you are.

Charles Spurgeon said, “If a soul has any beauty, it is because Christ has endowed that soul with His own, for in ourselves we are deformed and defiled! There is no beauty in any of us but what our Lord has worked in us.”

The world would lead you to believe that you have “beauty within you” and that if you could only learn to love yourself “just the way you are” you would be confident and happy. The TRUTH, as Spurgeon so plainly put it, “We do not actually possess any beauty or goodness of our own accord.” 

“Every one of them has turned aside; together they have become corrupt; There is no one who does good, not even one.”  Psalms 53:3 NASB

The only beauty, confidence or worth you can ever have is in Jesus Christ. And His loveliness will only come shining through in your life when self has gotten out of the way. 

As John the Baptist declared, “I must decrease, but He must increase.”  John 3:30 NASB

Rather than trying to build up your self-esteem and “feel good about yourself” (which doesn’t produce lasting confidence anyway) you are to let thoughts of self fade completely into the background. Remember that to “deny yourself” according to the Bible literally means to lose sight of yourself and your own interests. You will only gain lasting security when you look away from yourself and toward Jesus Christ. 

God’s Word is full of information about your identity and position as a believer in Jesus Christ. Let the wonder of God’s perspective on you soak in. Do you fully realize what it means to be:

The question “who am I?” is not nearly as important as the question, “who is He?”  Learning to see yourself through God’s eyes is key for He is the Beholder.

Be Blessed,  Laurie

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The Crying Corner

When does sadness, loneliness, stress, and for some anxiety step over the line and become depression?  I have suffered with varying degrees of depression for most of my life and have dealt with it in many different  ways from doctor prescribed medication, counseling, suicidal thoughts, self-help book reading, excessive drinking, shopping, sleeping, and binge eating.  None of the before mentioned methods had lasting results let alone were they healthy.  I’m excited to share what I’ve learn and how my life has changed.

I know and believe with all my heart that Satan is at the core of depression.  Satan has the ability to twist true feelings and situations into dark places.  I’m no stranger to abuse, loss, physical illness and financial worry.  Satan’s twist makes you feel failure, guilt, anger, worthless and hopeless…your feelings out of control cause you to begin spiraling down.

If you believe in God and with that I mean Jesus Christ our Savior who has given us His Word “The Bible” you must also believe in Satan.  Understanding and believing this TRUTH is key in fighting depression.  If your reading this post and do not know Jesus Christ as your personal Savior I strongly suggest you seek out the truth found in Christ and make a commitment to Him.  You can find answers and help at a local church.  A small aside…make sure the church you chose teaches from the Bible in its whole and believes in the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.  Unfortunately, some churches have fallen away from these core beliefs and have become lost serving man instead of Jesus Christ.

For more than 40 years I struggled with depression without lasting help.  Only through my personal relationship with Jesus is Satan losing the battle of holding me in darkness.  So what happened simply put I started turning every thought I had over to Jesus and measuring those thoughts by His Word to determine whether  they are true.  Though scripture I’m able to look at my feelings, thoughts and circumstances.  Jesus helps me find truth and I’m able to separate the lies Satan would have me believe about myself and any circumstance.  I wish I could tell you this is an easy process but your past has a toll on your beliefs.  Destructive past experiences and possibly your life at this moment can contribute to holding you in darkness and giving Satan the fuel to keep you depressed.  Jesus gives strength, clarity and most importantly freedom from Satan’s grip.

The best way for me to explain what I mean is by example.   During those long years of fighting depression without Jesus I have found myself in what I call “THE CRYING CORNER”.  This feeling is crippling, I found myself very emotional many times in my bedroom down in the corner weeping uncontrollably.  Most of the time it was life circumstances that brought me there.  In my mind NO WAY OUT was  consuming me.  Trapped in a marriage with a man who mentally and physically was abusing my sons and me.  My self-esteemed destroyed by Satan though this man and my childhood.  I thought I deserved where I was in the “crying corner”.

Day to day life became a struggle.  I performed my duties as a mother and wife with a deep depression just below the surface.  I missed many opportunities for joy and I let those I cared about down.   One such day I had been asked by a dear friend I had know for years to be maid of honor in her wedding I was so lost the day of her wedding I just didn’t show up.  She never spoke to me again.  How could I have done that?  My life on that day and the days leading up to it were dark.  I was being manipulated by Satan through my husband which made me unable to leave my home.  Days like this were common.

Then I was introduced to Jesus and His Word in a new way.  You see the Bible is not an historical account of God’s people nor is it bedtime stories.  Every Word is for you today and everyday.  Salvation is not just for “getting into heaven”.  Salvation by definition is “Preservation or deliverance from destruction, difficulty, or evil.”  What Jesus did for me by dying on the cross was deliverance.  

The Bible became my go to place in battling Satan and depression.  Through scripture, prayer and the power of the Holy Spirit my life began to change.  I got involved at my church and began praying for the Lord to show me what changes I needed to make, those changes began with surrendering my life to Christ.

I began with these scriptures:

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.”  Hebrews 4:12 NIV

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”  Philippians 4:8 NIV

“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:5

Jesus wants to set you free.  He died for you so that you would no longer be trapped by the world but would have the power through him to set yourself apart from Satan’s destructive ways.

My prayers are for you!  Discover your own scriptures, build a army of God’s Word to fight against evil.

Laurie